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New event on July 24 designed to celebrate the ‘privilege that is life'
Friday, June 25, 2010
 Click here to enlarge this photo Below, submitted photo;
left, staff photo by
JESSE YEATMAN
Laurie and Cmdr. John "Pags" Paganelli of California walk the track at Leonardtown High School during this year's Relay For Life on June 12. The couple, whose only child, Jordan Paganelli, below, died in November, is planning an event in their son's memory for next month.
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Laurie and Cmdr. John "Pags" Paganelli of Wildewood walked their first few laps around the track together at this year's Relay For Life on June 12 at Leonardtown High School.
The relay, which raises funds for the American Cancer Society, was held seven months after the Paganellis' only child, Jordan Paganelli, died from the disease. Jordan died Nov. 9, 2009, just five days before his 18th birthday, after a struggle with alveolar rhabdomyosarcoma, an aggressive soft-tissue cancer that most often affects children.
"Everything from this point on is bittersweet," Laurie said as they walked the track.
At the Relay For Life's opening ceremonies, the Paganellis announced a new event they are organizing in their son's memory, the first JRock-n-Run. It is billed as a combination run/walk, community festival and live concert and is scheduled for the evening of July 24 at Sotterley Plantation in Hollywood.
"My name is Jordan's dad," John said. "And right over there is my wife, Jordan's mom … We have been truly touched and blessed by your kindness."
Later, the couple described the support they've received and continue to receive from their son's friends and classmates, neighbors and the community at large. Neighbors regularly watch for ways they can assist the Paganellis. Graduates at Leonardtown High School this spring affixed Jordan's initials to the top of their mortarboards in tribute to their classmate. The Relay For Life St. Mary's has established a JP Spirit award in his honor. John, who flies F-18s, said the commanding officer of VX-23 (Cmdr. Beau Duarte) dedicated an F/A-18 Hornet aircraft to Jordan, and a Jordan Paganelli Inspirational Leadership Award was established at Patuxent River Naval Air Station, where John is stationed. A Team JP T-shirt from a previous Relay For Life owned by Cmdr. Scott Tingle, a NASA astronaut, went on the last shuttle mission, John said.
And Jordan's Facebook page is filled with comments from friends who still post notes at the site. "It's so beautiful," Laurie said.
Even with this support, the last seven months have been hard. Both John and Laurie have been in grief counseling. He wants to talk and talk about what they've been through, and he looks for opportunities to share their story with area groups. Laurie says it is hard to finish a sentence when talking about what has happened.
The Paganellis hope to focus some of the energy the community showered on the family as they dealt with Jordan's illness and then his death on the JRock-n-Run.
"Our vision is to create an annual event that brings the community together," John said. It is also designed to raise funds and awareness for sarcoma research.
John described the planned July 24 event as something that will capture "the essence of Jordan's three passions — running, music, friendship." In addition to a run and fun walk, the event will include food and games and Wii and Guitar Hero tournaments.
Many of Jordan's friends are assisting with the JRock-n-Run. Shay McNamara, one of a particularly close group of friends in the Paganellis' Wildewood neighborhood, said he expects that, considering how supportive the community has already been of the Paganellis, there will be a great turnout at the first event next month. "I think it's going to be incredible," he said. He plans to run in the event.
McNamara said Jordan's friends offered ideas as the Paganellis organized the JRock-n-Run. John told McNamara and the others that the addition of the Guitar Hero tournament was inspired from listening to them play playing in the basement with Jordan.
Losing their friend was difficult, McNamara said, particularly when Jordan was first diagnosed about two years ago and then when he was told in October that he probably only had a couple of weeks to live. "It was really hard, but to be honest, we've talked about it. The thing that has made it easier is that we have each other," he said of the neighborhood friends. And "Jordan's amazingly positive attitude through everything" helped, he said.
McNamara said Jordan's parents also had inspired everyone.
They stay in touch with their son's friends and continue to encourage them to appreciate and make the most of the life they've been given, John said.
Back at the opening for the Relay For Life, John repeated this advice when he invited the relay crowd to participate in the JRock-n-Run "as we honor Jordan and celebrate the privilege that is life."
It's a message that Jordan's parents have taken away from the last year's experience, and it's a message that John has been sharing at schools, Relay For Life meetings and some businesses. When Jordan was diagnosed and then told his condition was terminal, his parents said he accepted his fate and handled the situation extraordinarily well. He never complained, they said.
"Jordan was chosen as an instrument of enlightenment of the privilege of life," John said. "He has affected thousands of people. Some people go kicking and screaming. Jordan went so gracefully."
"Death can be beautiful … hard, but beautiful. And it was," Laurie said.
Watching his son's dignity and kindness to others changed John, he said. "I have a whole new perspective on things. I've stepped back and appreciated … We all go through the daily grind of life. We tend to forget what's important. It's like an awakening."
"Such a bigger picture," Laurie said.
If you want to go
The JRock-n-Run will be held Saturday, July 24, at Sotterley Plantation in Hollywood. A 5K trail run and 1.5K fun walk will start at 6 p.m. Check-in and same-day registration opens at 4 p.m. Bands start playing at 5 p.m. Venue closes at 10 p.m. Event T-shirts and embroidered Team JP towels will be available when participants register. The event will include food vendors, a Guitar Hero tournament and Wii tennis and bowling tournaments, bocce ball games, dunk tank, ultimate Frisbee games and live music.
For information on how to register or sponsor the JRock-n-Run, see www.jrocknrun.org. Organizers request early registration when possible to assist with planning.
Organizations interested in having Cmdr. John "Pags" Paganelli speak to their group are invited to e-mail requests to PagsZoo@verizon.net.
